How Not to Digest Information

Why is it that boomers are incapable of ingesting information, unless it is presented to them through a talking head at a desk with a tickertape running below and blaring synthetic trumpets? All of this accompanied by animated graphics flying accross the screen and constant popups in the corner reminding the cattle which flavor of boomer news they have tuned into.

Whenever I have the misfortune of encountering anything formatted in this way, I puke a little. They are capable of taking raw clips, perhaps a recording from an individual's device, and chopping it up into little bits with the audio almost completely drowned out by the dialogue of the talking heads. You never actually see or hear what the subject matter of the source is, at least not with the clarity needed to be able to discern anything meaningful about it with your own eyes and ears. And watched beginning to end, the boomerized version always takes ten times longer to get through than the raw source due to all of the fluff padding mealy mouthed commentary and synthetic orchestra intros and outros.

It is as though baby boomers clamor to be spoon fed information and then imbued with perspectives about it which are not their own. And their news sources always seem to pick up on things somewhere down the chain, days or even weeks after the subject matter has already made its rounds among individuals in the online space. Perhaps as a result of the time needed for elaborate editing, prepared speeches and set props before rendering the final turd.

And, maybe the most bizarre I've found, is that they will actually run ads pitching the value of television formatted news as "a friendly way to catch up with your local familiar faces". Does anybody with an IQ above 70 actually believe that this style of information distribution is anything other than localized end points receiving scripts from a national or global top-town network?